Sunday, March 19, 2006

Wildlife programs.

Thats it, i'm renouncing them.

Its not that I'm squeemish, all in all i'm quite philisophical and sanguine about the more horrific aspect of nature, some I even find inappropriatly hilarious (the fact that the male Praying Mantis can't copulate with its head still attatched to its body? God, if there is one, is female, and pissed) (you want more proof that She 's female? Ok, the average human female, on the first two to three days of her cycle - the bit with the pms - needs 500 or so more callories a day -roughly the amount of calories in a large bar of chocolate. *)

But watching this program about rivers, theres a section on Wildebeast crossing the rivvers full of waiting crocs. I've seen this before, I can deal, I don't like, but I can deal, there are so many of them, not endangerd, of use, part of the 'circle' at least its a quick death....

Then the bastard narrator, lovingly describes how once the croc has bitten it never lets go. Yup, knew that (dealing, dealing). 'Cept now they show you a wildebeast caught only by the leg, panic stricken, struggling, obviously in Pain. Narrator? (not perturbed in the slightest, almost happy sounding) it takes over an hour for the beast to drrooowwwn... (what, was he mugged by a herd or something?!?)

Friggin bastard! I hate you, stupid stupid presenter and all you animals. Bloody crocs, slow drowning wildebeasts! I hate you all!

Its like, I was once traumatised for weeks after one show (probably Dickie A again) slaveringly described how mother cheetahs don't kill the zebra's outright, they catch, have a little knaw, let them loose for the cubs to practise their hunting. I can see, could see even then, the neccesity of it. BUT I WAS TEN FOR F'S SAKES!

This is the girl (6years) who believed when her mother told her that if you eat apple pip a tree will grow in your stomach, and didn't eat apples for six years (and still can't eat them with out dissecting them with a knife first)

But my moms boyfriend, even more philisophical than I over these things, pointed out basically that thats what amimals do, the just well, feed fight and fuck, (His actual words, they have a cetain poetry to them) he also pointed out that it is the function of nature, propagation, fill the gaps with infinite variety. We're never going to get great works of art or poetry or whatever from them (well, 'cept maybe primates and elephants) and some of them are pretty pointless to the casual observer - mayflies, born, float, surface, mate, die - the first two take years, the last three a matter of hours, huh? So it kind of made me appreciate humans more, sort of.

So I am renouncing the wildlife shows, still prefer the animals to most of the humans I meet.

1 Comments:

Blogger cozen said...

These are very large issues.

What about Canadians?

Sheesh!

2:44 pm  

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